Planning a Wedding on a Realistic Budget
iMemoryfilms adds that this GREAT article was written by
Sara L. Ambarian - author/creative consultant/custom bridal designer
Visit her website:
www.frazmtn.com/~ambarian/
Contrary
to what they say in the magazines and on-line now, you don't have to
spend a fortune to have a wonderful, memorable wedding. I tell my
clients and my readers that the most important part of making a wedding
memorable is focusing on and prioritizing what you want to achieve.
Fortunately, that same focus will help you save money as well!
You
can look at all the planning guidelines and timelines in magazines and
on websites for ideas of things you might do, but don't get boxed in by
them-- real weddings come together in a much different way than
magazines and many experts suggest.
You and your fiancé need to
sit down and really talk and think about what you want MOST for the
wedding-- a certain location, a large guest list, great photography, a
really fancy gown and accessories. Start making notes of what you really
want and what you can live without. Compare your ideas, and compromise
when necessary, to come up with a wedding you'll both love.
When
you have an idea of what's most important to you, you can start finding
out what those things will cost. Call around, ask around, make notes,
add things up. Then when you have an idea of what you'll do, start with
the most important priorities FIRST, so you make sure you can afford
them. Then you can compromise on, or even omit, some of the less
important things as your budget gets stretched.
The following is a
compilation of ideas I have sent to various brides who were looking to
keep their expenses and/or weddings small, but memorable.
General Budget/Cash Flow Issues--
~
Careful timing can reduce reception costs. Do you have a time set for
the wedding? If you don't want to spend a lot on refreshments, plan the
wedding and reception at a time other than mealtime. This is tricky
because the length of time a wedding and reception takes, but you can
work with it a little.
Usually, for instance, it's tough to have a
morning wedding early enough to avoid feeding the guests lunch. Even a
very short ceremony and reception that starts at 10 am is going to run
into "lunchtime" (and some guests may expect brunch, since many morning
weddings offer that.)
In the afternoon, you could plan the wedding
to start, say, 1:30 or 2 pm, and figure you can have people on their
way before 5 if there are no real activities except socializing and
limited light refreshments.
In the evening, you can work it the
same way, if you wish. Any ceremony after about 6:30 pm (or certainly 7)
would be "after dinner" (in most regions), so you could plan to only
serve dessert rather than a buffet or meal.
~ Make some things for
the wedding yourself. Doing-it-yourself is not always as much cheaper
as it used to be, but it still saves you labor charges, if you have
creative talents and energy. I encourage couples and families to make
garters or bridesmaids dresses, arrange flowers, cook the reception
food-- whatever they are good at. It's cheaper, and it's often more
meaningful to have had a hand in the preparations personally. Also, many
family and friends really ENJOY helping out with wedding prep. Don't be
afraid to ask! : )
~ Consider marrying on Friday evening. This is
NOT the most convenient arrangement, because people have to get out of
work early, etc. It can also be difficult for any out-of-town guests you
might have, because it may force them to take an additional day off
work to arrive in time for all the festivities. But you can sometimes
get discounts on sites and services. If you are *really* tight in the
budget, this could be an option worth researching.
~~One other
**very important** thing to remember when money is tight--- most of your
bills will come due right before the wedding. Usually you pay 1/2
up-front for services, and then the last couple weeks before the
wedding, everyone wants their other half paid. BE PREPARED FOR THIS! Try
to look ahead so you will have the cash flow you need when all those
payments go out at once. If you can, save extra *right away* while you
are in the early planning stages, because you will need it later.
Also,
plan your budget *smaller* than you think you could really afford. If
your wedding expenses come within that figure, that will be great. But
if one or two things turn out to be more expensive than you expected,
you won't be right at the absolute limit of your funds. It will give you
peace of mind.
Location/Guest List--
~ Keep your guest list small. The more people, the bigger the location, the more food, the more invitations, etc.
~
Have the wedding and reception in the same place. It's trendy to have
them separate locations, but frankly, as a guest, I really dislike the
practice (all that extra driving and parking). And from the couple's
standpoint, it's much cheaper to do it all in one place. It's also more
convenient and relaxing for everyone involved.
~ Consider an
less-traditional location. In most areas, many attractive locations are
willing to have weddings-- not just the churches, hotels and country
clubs where most weddings take place. Some non-traditional locations
will cost you more, but others may cost *considerably* less. So do some
research, and make some calls. Likely locations include, parks (local,
state and national), bed-and-breakfasts, country inns, restaurants,
public gardens, historic homes or monuments, museums, galleries, and
private homes of friends or family.
When considering the
suitability of *any* location, be sure to find out not just about the
price to rent the location, but also about parking, seating, restrooms,
food preparation and/or storage, dressing areas, security, electrical
hook-ups, restrictions or regulations (on alcohol, attire, photography
or videography, decorations, etc.) Anything not provided or conveniently
available may cost you more to rent or provide on your own.
Attire--
~
The two best ways to save money on attire are to dress very casually,
or to sew your own (or have a friend or relative sew your) gown and/or
bridesmaids' gowns. But even casual gowns can be quite costly in the
current market, unless you are able to take advantage of sales or other
discounts.
Home-sewn gowns are less popular now than they were in
the 70's and 80's. However, since the current styles and fabrics are
actually fairly easy to sew, it seems a shame that more brides and their
families do not make use of this option--especially for bridesmaids and
flowergirls.
Obviously, good general sewing skills and a
dependable sewing machine are necessary, as well as a reasonable "eye"
for fitting. But if you consider that a bride recently commented to me
that she was *happy* to find a flowergirl dress for "only" $99 (other
similar gowns were as much as $150), it seems clear that sewing should
be an option budget-conscious brides at least *consider*.
~
Headpieces and some accessories are very inexpensive to make, as well.
Good instructions are available in books and with patterns. If you are
creative at all, you might look into this option. Mark-ups on
headpieces, especially, are VERY high in most bridal boutiques, so this
can net you a big savings from retail.
~ If you will buy your gown
"off-the-rack", big discount bridal stores and on-line resources can
offer lower prices-- but consider what you may, or may not, get from
these sources in the way of quality, personal service, dependability,
selection, alterations, etc. Some are excellent; others are not. Working
with a company or resource you have personal references for is the
best, whenever possible.
~ If you will hire a dressmaker to save
money, remember that the talents and prices and quality provided will
vary considerably. You might be fortunate to have a very inexpensive,
but fabulously talented dressmaker available to you. On the other hand,
to get the best deal from a more expensive dressmaker or designer, you
might decide to simplify your fabric and detailing choices to include
only what's MOST important to you. The other advantage of having a gown
made is that, at least you will not have to worry about alterations
costs on top of the purchase price.
~ Menswear costs can be reduced by having the men wear suits they own, for example, rather than renting matching formalwear.
Decorations/Flowers--
~
If you will use fresh flowers, try to choose varieties which will be
in-season at the time of your wedding date. Skip extra arrangements on
the altars, reception tables, etc. If you must decorate these areas,
consider using inexpensive live plants (home centers, discount stores,
large nurseries, and even grocery stores sometimes have great prices on
potted plants.) Be sure, however, that any plants or flowers used near
food are not toxic.
~ Keep the bouquets small. Let the bouquets do
double-duty for decoration, by laying them out on your tables at the
reception. Consider eliminating corsages and boutonnieres for anyone
besides your own and your fiancé's parents.
~ Consider arranging
silk or dried flowers yourself. The price of professionally-arranged
silk or dried bouquets is often about the same as fresh flower prices.
However, if you use careful shopping, creative filler options, a bit of
patience, and some ingenuity, you can often save money by arranging silk
or dried flowers yourself. If you haven't worked with floral arranging
before, start with the boutonnieres. They are easy to handle and help
you get familiar with the general techniques and products you will use
on the larger arrangements.
~ Not all locations need extra
decorations. It is not necessary to totally *transform* your ceremony or
reception location in order to have a beautiful and memorable wedding.
If your budget is tight, do the minimum you are comfortable with.
~
If you really need some color and interest in a really boring reception
location (a common problem), I have seen really pretty, classy effects
achieved with really simple, inexpensive party materials, like balloons,
streamers (especially metallic or pearlized), honeycomb wedding bells,
inexpensive fabrics, candles, confetti and glitter.
If you choose
to use materials like these, choose your colors carefully so they are
not too harsh, and look for ways to combine materials and add small
decorative details (silk flowers, ribbons, floating beads, etc.) to
create a more complex, customized look.
Refreshments--
~ Your choice of refreshments is very important to how much the reception will cost.
Generally,
the least expensive reception is a cake and punch reception. Cake is
really the minimum food you should serve. You can cut cake costs, if
necessary, by having a very small decorative and/or stacked cake, and
supplementing the servings with additional sheet cake in the same
flavor. Punch is an easy and inexpensive beverage, and it can be very
fun to make (ideas for a custom punch recipe can be found in A Bride's
Touch on page 249).
A cake and punch reception usually also
includes coffee and perhaps tea, individual sodas instead of punch if
you prefer (but that costs more), and sometimes champagne or other
alcohol (but that's a pricey item, too.) There has also recently been a
trend toward offering other desserts besides cake, so you could have a
"dessert and punch" reception for a little more than a standard cake and
punch affair.
A pot-luck is next most expensive, because it
should be assumed that you and your family will contribute several
dishes. In some social circles, this works out very well, and makes for a
very fun and tasty reception. There is a lot of variety in the food
(something for everyone, usually) and even if some guests are not
able/willing to bring something, there's usually plenty. This sort of
arrangement works well for family- or church-oriented weddings, where
guests feel that bringing a dish is a way to help the couple celebrate.
In other circles, guests may consider this in poor taste, feeling that
the bride's (and perhaps groom's family) should be treating the guests
to a meal. You would have to check around with family and friends to see
how they would feel about this idea.
Some hosting families opt to
prepare the food themselves. It gives them control over the cost and
menu, but eliminates the potluck concept of asking others to bring
something. If you have a lot of guests, you could also ask for help from
the bridal party members and your closest family and friends.
Cold
food works the best for this because you can buy and prepare it ahead.
If you have family or friends willing to help, it's not too taxing to
have them each make a double or triple recipe of one dish like potato or
crab salad, or a platter of cold cuts, or a tray of rolls. Warehouse
and food service stores like Price Club and Smart and Final have made
this even easier, providing good prices for large quantities, and (at
Smart and Final and other restaurant suppliers), low cost serving dishes
and utensils as well. I have found that big plastic punch bowls are
excellent for serving salads and other large dishes attractively and
economically.
Of "catered" options, prices would range from
purchasing trays at a supermarket or other deli, to having a restaurant
or caterer provide trays or a simple buffet, to having a formal sit-down
dinner cooked by the kitchen at the reception site or a private
caterer, to really elaborate, multi-course banquets.
Entertainment--
~
Providing entertainment or activities costs extra, generally. If you
want to keep the reception low-key, skip or at least limit music and
dancing (this will also save you from having to rent a dance floor). If
you have access to a small sound system, at the location or through a
friend, you can supply your own background music through CDs or
cassettes.
You may or may not need a microphone at all, depending
on what you choose to include in the way of toasts and announcements. If
you keep it really informal, just a chance to chat with guests, you can
get away with almost no extra equipment or related preparation. This
will also tend to keep the reception short, since guests won't be
staying late to dance and party.
Professionals--
~
Hiring professionals, of course, accounts for a great chunk of many
wedding budgets. As a professional myself, and speaking for the many
fine wedding professionals I know, this is often money very well spent.
However, people have married *without* the help of professional
dressmakers, florists, caterers, photographers, videographers,
musicians, and event planners for hundreds of years. And some couples
still do.
If your budget is really tight, pick your professionals
with care. Personally, for my own wedding, photography was the most
important professional priority (see article); and many couples I have
interviewed have felt the same. For you, it might be a particular
florist or caterer. But remember you *do not* have to hire every
professional suggested in the bridal magazines, or by people you know.
You can choose to spend the money you have on what matters most to you.
~
Consultants, coordinators and event planners are currently touted by
most magazines, and many bridal advisors, as an *essential* element of
modern wedding planning. They site money savings, higher quality wedding
"results", planning-stress reduction, and more. I think it is important
to point out, however, that many, if not most, weddings are planned
*without* the help of this type of professional. And most of them are
beautiful, happy, fun and memorable.
There *are* situations where a
bridal consultant, coordinator or event planner is very helpful-- and
still another few situations where one *might* be essential. But if you
are planning a relatively average wedding, and you are concerned with
keeping costs down, this is a professional I believe you can safely
skip-- no matter what the magazines say.
Good advice and
information about wedding planning is available from many free or
inexpensive sources-- friends and family, your local library, the
internet, and many of the wedding professionals with whom you will be
working. Don't sell any of these resources short!
* * * *
And
don't let anyone intimidate you by making wedding planning seem more
complicated than it is. A lot of the people who emphasize the stresses,
costs, and frustrations of planning are either selling something, or
they have been heavily influenced by those who are.
LOTS of
couples plan wonderful weddings without suffering tremendous stress,
without going into years of debt, without having horrible fights with
their future spouses-- and without losing sight of the reason they are
doing all of this in the first place. You can, too! Best wishes to you!!
For
the best in wedding videography, visit our website,
www.imemoryfilms.com. For additional wedding info, details and planning
tips, visit our blog at www.imemoryfilms.wordpress.com
www.imemoryfilms.com
818.760.9490
info@imemoryfilms.com
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